Spinsterblog

I scampered over to the MLB website the other day to vote for the All Star Game. And can I just say that it alarms me that I now know enough players in the National League that I can vote for them, too? Last year I think I just voted a straight Red Sox/Devil Rays ticket and then chose players at random.

This year is very exciting because Kevin Youkilis is starting at first base every day! So I couldn’t wait to go vote for him because he’d finally have an opportunity!

Only: no.

Apparently the All Satr Game is at a National League park this year, which is fine, whatever, except for the fact that it means that American League votes don’t have a DH option. And you know what that means?  It means that David Ortiz is listed at first base. Poor Kevin Youkilis, who has been amazing at first, doesn’t even get his name on the damn ballot.

Now, Papi is amazing and I don’t begrudge him his sure All Star spot, but it hardly seems fair that Kevin Youkilis gets tossed to the side like that, particularly considering how well he’s been doing this year. How’s he supposed to compete with Ortiz? And how’s Youkilis supposed to compete with Ortiz when he’s a write-in candidate?

So, needless to say, David Ortiz didn’t get my vote.  I don’t think he needs it, anyway, and all my first base votes will be write-ins.

My apologies for this, but I thought I’d write a quick post in case someone out there decides to Google “does MLB TV suck?” or “is MLB TV worth it?” or “MLB TV and lack of customer service.”

Let me say that I don’t follow my local baseball team and so in theory MLB TV should be a godsend. I can watch Red Sox games!  I can watch Devil Rays games! I can watch the Mets whenever Pedro is pitching!

However, MLB TV’s service is a bunch of crap. And here, in beautiful list form, are the reasons why it sucks (and I should note that it’s declined significantly from last season).

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On today’s episode of Baseball Lookalike Theater, I give you:

Dennis Eckersley	My father

Look at that! My first non-Joss title. And, while I’m mentioning it I’d like to give credit to the fine folks (folk?) at the Buffyverse Dialogue Database, from whence every other title in this blog originated. Someday there will be an entry here on how whither, hither, and whence are awesome words that deserve more usage, but that day is not today.

The New York Times has named Toni Morrison’s Beloved the “The Best Work of American Fiction of the Last 25 Years.” And you know what I have to say about that? A-MEN.

I first read Beloved in high school and I loved it for many reasons, but the primary one is that it made my English assignments eleventy times easier.  An essay on imagery?  Tons of that! How about some themes? And some symbolism?  Sure!  Have at it!

But, really, though, it’s the topics she covers in the book–family, oppression, forgiveness, ostracism — that’s really what I love.  It is a HARD book to read, but the end kills me (in a good way). I mean, I love Scott Fitz and his boats against the current, but nothing, NOTHING! will bring tears to my eyes immediately like the phrase “you are your own best thing.”

Because you are, y’all.

I could wax rhapsodic about last night’s Sox/Yankees game, but *everyone* will be doing that. Well, everyone that doesn’t cheer for the damn Yankees, anyway.

Instead I’m going to talk about something very important to sports: FASHION!!

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And speaking of playing the who-do-they-look-like game, this one’s for Lisa.

Josh Beckett looks like Skeet Ulrich.

Seriously, people?  No one’s going to even mention the new graphics?  There’s pouting. Major pouting. 

Thank you to Jason Varitek for killing last night’s Rally of Statistical Improbability. Dustin Mohr reaches on a passed ball, Willie Harris steals not one but TWO bases, and with a runner on third you don’t even swing at the damn ball?!?! In a related vein, Note To Self: It’s spring and your windows are open–you should probably try not to scream, “SONOFABITCH!!!” at the television at 10:30 at night.

So, Mike Lowell is clutch.

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Hey, did y’all hear that Johnny Damon played his first game in pinstripes at Fenway Park last night?

:::headdesk:::

I’d like to preface this by saying that Johnny Damon deserves to be booed–he’s a Yankee now. However, I’m also of the opinion that he didn’t deserve the treatment he got at Fenway last night and I felt bad for him. (I was on the “ignore him” side of the “what do we do?” argument.) But furthermore, he needs to SHUT UP and stop talking about it.

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A longer, rantier entry is coming, but first I wanted to post a short, spammy one.

In her most recent post, Jane Espenson talked about callbacks. Buffy was one of the best shows for the callback, and I wanted to share mine, because it is *awesome* and because I can–isn’t that what blogs are for?

In the third season premiere, Anne, the Scoobies are doing Buffy’s job while she’s MIA, slaying vampires, and we get the following exchange:

XANDER: That’s right, he was! Cheater! (to Willow) Okay, and the, uh, second problem I’m having… ‘Come and get it, Big Boy’?

WILLOW: Well…well, the Slayer always says a pun or a witty play on words, and I think it throws the vampires off, and, and it makes them *frightened* because I’m wisecracking. Okay, I didn’t really have a chance to work on that one, but *you* try it every time.

OZ: Uh, if I may suggest: ‘This time it’s personal.’ I mean, there’s a reason why it’s a classic.

And then, *eleven* episodes later, in Helpless, when Buffy’s lost her Slayer skills and still has to kill a vampire, she says this:

BUFFY: If I was at full Slayer power, I’d be punning right about now.

Just brilliant. And a fun callback for fans.

On a completely unrelated note, I’m considering changing the blog’s look for summer.  I was thinking citrus or possibly beaches.

Rather than being direct and actually commenting in other people’s blogs, I thought I’d take the good, old-fashioned passive aggressive approach and get some things off my chest here.

1. Kevin Youkilis’ performance this season is a big damn surprise. Everyone’s been all in a tizzy about how well Youk’s been doing at first base and how great he’s been hitting (or, well, he was–yesterday was an off day).  Suddenly Youkilis being a great player is a big damn surprise, and I don’t understand why everyone seems to think he’d finally get a starting spot on the roster and start to suck.  But not me.  *I’m* not a bandwagoner, even though I can’t get a Youkilis shirt because of my previously mentioned magical jinxing skills.

2. Wily Mo spells his name wrong. Wily Mo is from the Dominican Republic. In Spanish, a “ll” would sound like a “y”, making “Willy” have the pronunciation of “Wi-yi.” He spells it exactly right for a Latino.

3. Nobody has any interest in Lenny DiNardo. Okay, his performance hasn’t been great, but why are there not swarms of pink 55 jerseys at Fenway every game day?* Johnny Damon was an attractive guy when his hair was long and he wasn’t playing for the damn Yankees, but Lenny DiNardo is HOT. Also, he likes REM, and that makes him infinitely more attractive in Mel-world, I will admit.

4. Doug Mirabelli’s return is the greatest thing ever. Yes, I’m very glad he’s back,  but it won’t matter a bit if the rest of the team is unable to score some runs when Wake is pitching. If everyone could lay off poor Josh Bard, that would make me happy, because I feel bad for him. He’s getting blamed for many things, only one of which is his actual reponsibility.

* I am in no way condoning the pink jersey, so you don’t need to smack me, Danielle.